When I was arrested for hitting my wife, I knew my behavior was wrong and fit squarely in the definition of domestic violence. I’d lost my temper, and in my rage, become physically abusive. I desperately wanted to change, but couldn’t help wondering: should I be in a...
One evening while I was slicing some zucchini for dinner, my (now ex) wife and I got into an argument. I don’t even remember what the argument was about, but in my frustration, I stabbed the knife into the cutting board. The look of horror on her face said it all: my...
What’s the difference between bad and awful? The two words seem pretty similar, don’t they? As it turns out, the distinction between thinking something is bad verses awful has a huge effect on how we react. Let me explain. Thoughts, emotions, actions I frequently...
I ended seven years of being single last week when I married a beautiful, loving, and wonderful woman who is a terrific partner. I’m sharing my journey here hoping it’s useful to those like me who have hurt their partners in the past with abuse or violence. This post...
Eric was struggling to see himself doing any of the ideas of how to stop violence that were being discussed in the domestic abuse help group. Jeff’s suggestion to Eric during a domestic violence program was brilliant: “If you can’t imagine yourself reacting...
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